You might be a redneck if...I mean I might be...

You might be a redneck if...I always wanted to think that I was just flirting with the distinction of being a redneck. BUT, NO...I'm a full blown redneck.

I might be a redneck if: I buy a car for $250 (yes $250 with title and license $366) and have to put $1000 (not really so far just $50) in it to get it to run
A window breaks in my house and put plastic up with duct tape and then the weather changes, it's too cold so a piece of plywood is put in it's place
There is a 1972 Motor home sitting in the yard being used as a storage shed...oh by the way it doesn't run
There is a 1995 Saturn with 250K miles sitting in the yard with a blown head
I had a burn pile right out the front door
My dog spends more time at my mother's house than mine
Same dog sleeps over at mom's house instead of coming home
I buy an electric gate opener and the gate stays open because the opener isn't working correctly.